Smartass John and Crazy Jane
Scene 13: John’s Initiation Ceremony
Translation © Eso A.B.
to the coast of Livonia
with wedding invitations,
Smartass John converted the gold
he had lucked out to discover
into fiat currencies,
which increased the value of the gold tenfold.
and blasted the surround with roars of pleasure.
At last, they would be able to free God
from the grip of governments
and the phoney miracle of quantitave easing.
The more people were converted to passion,
the more would go into death fearlessly
and no governments would have a say
in the matter.
three pairs of new boots.
One pair was to be made from
the feathers of cranes,
because he wished to dance
as if he were still the Dievel
and The Morning Star.
Queen Ra-Zhanna summoned
the hat maker and ordered a hat
made of the black feathers of cranes.
These were to surround
a vase filled with the blood of snakes.
Thus, when she shook her head
the blood woud splash round about.
She also ordered the ladies of the court
to fashion themselves masks
that expressed the unexpressable
desires of body and soul.
arrived flying on the backs of six crickets.
of the Kingdom
was on that same evening.
Princess of Otherworldly Charms was hid.
They all recited love poetry
not in the least shy.
Smartass John acted out his lewdest dreams,
King John The Dievel
Still, she kept her wits
and ordered that Dievels remains
be placed in a coffin
and that the Army officers corps
toss and shake it
as if resurrection had come.
had turned into chocolate pudding.
Queen Ra-Zhanna’s face lit up
Like that of the Sun.
She let go of a scream no less terrifying
than when she sliced the heads of her daughters.
My lips and tongue have turned black
from impatience to taste the recipe.
Hence forth, hell is youe kingdom,
all mortals are your slaves,
and my daughter is yours for the taking!
was both surprised as puzzled.
He turned to Ra-Zhanna and asked:
but where is the Princess?
Go ask your brothers.
slid behind the clouds.
She was overcome with shame
That She was the mother of such a fool.
The entire court of Kingdom come
began to laugh.
With one leap he lept
from Smartass John
to King John Dievel Divine.
Yet, he is none the wiser.
from King John Divine Dievel
his crane feathered boots,
and marinate your crotch in chocolate pudding.
of such preposterous initiation ceremonies,
yet submitted. Then walked toward
King John Dievel’s coffin.
had the entire officers corps
make John sit in it.
King John Dievel Divine surprised
When he made no protest, but asked:
Are you witless?
She is behind that door.
There, John! There!