Smartass John and Crazy Jane
Scene 12: Wedding As For War
Translation © Eso A.B.
King John The Divine Dievel arrived.
This time he did not come bare foot,
but in brown boots well licked
and polished by his servants.
He wore light green pants
topped by a red vest
with gold medals on his breast,
red epaulets rimmed by gold thread,
and a glistening sword stuck in his belt.
On his head he wore a tin crown
bedecked with mirrors
that blinded those who dared look.
John The Divine Dievel ordered the guards
to open the gate
and come help load the gold
unto yet other waiting wagons.
Then he addresses Smartass John:
worthy of the hand of my daughter.
Princess Dievaine Unsurpassed
will be delighted to pump you
empty of all prayers.
I only wish all proto-Latvians
were as devoted
to saving God as you.
I have waited for this moment a long time.
I am greatly honored.
Perhaps you will allow me
and let me have a peek at the Princess
and propose to her a mating extravaganza
sure to be exiting enough
to bring even God back to life.