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With a flip of its tail, the fish sent
Clever John and the entire sand dune to the gate of Yenghis Khan’s castle. Soon
there was, however, another problem: How to bring the gold to Yenghis Khan? John
had neither a horse, nor a wagon, nor servants to help him.
But no sooner is there trouble, a solution,
too, is at hand. Out of the cloud appears Crazy Jane again. This time, she sets
herself down on earth. Next to her stands the Mother of the Devil. The mother’s
hair is yellow streaked with red. It is all over her face or stands straight up
in the air. In her hands she holds the reins of Rocinante, who—whereever she
fell--appeared to have survived the fall in good shape. Her reins and bridle
are of gold and gold mesh.
Crazy Jane and her mother help Clever John
lift the pile of gold into the wagon. Crazy Jane whispers into John’s ear yet
another piece of advice: “Don’t be in a hurry. Walk slowly as if you are a
prince. You are no longer just a mover of hay and catcher of crickets. Yenghis
Khan is good his word. Your Princess
will not disappear. You’ve practically paid your life for her.”
Jersika, the Devil’s
Castle
Having loaded the wagon with gold, Clever
John drove to the main door of Yenghis Khan’s castle.
Over the gate hung a large sign, where in large
letters was written “JERSIKA”, a Latvian word that stands for “Jerusalem
When Yenghis Khan had inspected the quality
of the gold, he called for his daughter, the princess Complete Satisfaction. The
six drummers picked up six horns and trumpeted: “Com-plea-at! Com-plea-at! Sa-sa-tis-faction! Sa-sa-tis-faction!
Sa-sa-tis-fac-tion-tion!”
But the King and Clever John waited in
vain. In a while, a guard came running to announce that Complete Satisfaction
was delayed. Yenghis Khan apologized to John for the inconvenience, and said he
hoped that Clever John understood that Complete Satisfaction could not be
anything but what her name foretold.
“Since you are clever, John, you surely
know how women are,” said Yenghis Khan. “They exhaust men by making them wait,
then give them one apple instead of two. But do not worry. You will surely meet
her in bed. I am told that she is preparing a surprise for you. You will be no
worse for the anticipation. Besides, the custom in Jersika is to celebrate the
marriage ceremony without the bride. It is thus that Complete Satisfaction
builds up to the ‘lihgo’ or halleluia event.”
Thus, Clever John had some time to preparee
wedding ceremony. He took some of the surplus gold and hired a full orchestra to
play him and the Princess a fanfare. He also sent an invitation to his
brothers. The whole day of the ninth day after “Johns Eve” passed in rehearsing
dances and preparing tournaments of strength and wit. Among the dancers were
the revived six sisters of Crazy Jane.
When the six brothers of Clever John
finally arrived, no sweeter reunion of lovers was ever seen. Even the Mother of
the Devil and King John the Great were seen dancing.
As for the six brothers: they would not
cease praising Clever John: Who could ever have imagined that bathing seven
crickets in the sea would lead to such awesome results and a feast that would
last a week?
At last, came the evening and it was time for
Clever John to go ‘lihgo’ with the Princess of Complete Satisfaction.
King John the Great along with the Mother
of the Devil lead Clever John to the bedroom door. When they arrived at the door,
they gave Clever John last minute advice: “The moment you go inside and see (by
the light of the door) where the bed is, do not wait, but dive into the divan.
Your bride (the Latvians call her “dahvana”) will be waiting for you. Do not hesitate.
If you do, the Princess may lose, both, heat and her desire for you.”
A
servant then opened the door of the Lihgo room. Clever John saw the double
spread divan and ran for it. As the servant closed the door, everything went
pitch black around him.
Clever John,
once under the blanket, did not waste time beginning to feel for the princess. He
soon felt something soft beside him. He felt a night gown, fond its buttons,
and… and… he felt straw. Can it be true that he had been fooled?
“What the
Devil…,” he began to shout and would have shouted some more, except the door of
the room suddenly opened and a shaft of light discovers Clever John on all
fours in bed feeling up a straw doll.
Into the
Lihgo room come a servant with a large candelabra alight with candles. Right
behind the servent came Crazy Jane.
As soon as
the servant put the candelabra on the table and left the room. Crazy Jane wasted no time and said what was on
her mind:
“What do you take me for, Clever John?” she screamed. “Was I not the woman who you proposed to? Do you really believe that some princess named Complete Satisfaction was just waiting for you with her butt raised in the air?”
For the
first time in his life Clever John is speechless. “But, but…”, he began, but no
other words came. Then he noticed that Crazy Jane was holding in her hands a
pair of leather boots. With her eyes flashing lightning, she threw the boots on
the bed.
“Put these
on,” she commanded. Clever John noticed that Crazy Jane, too, wore boots and
that her knees were shaking.
Clever John
did as Crazy Jane ordered and put on the boots.
The moment
the bottoms of his feet touched the inner soles of the boots, he felt himself
seized by a big shake. His skin was traversed by shivers, and then he was
seized by a heat wave that alternated with a cold wave. Crazy Jane pulled off
her night gown and with boots still on jumped into bed and snuggled up the
Clever John.
Those of the King’s court, including the Devil, King Yenghis Khan, and the
Sun, the Mother of the Devil, who stood outside the bedroom with an ear to the
door began to hear strange noises. The divan went: “Creek! Creek!” This was the
signal for the court chorus of Jersika to break out in Lihgo a song: “O Jersika! O
Jersika! Go lihgo! Lih-go! Lih-go!”.
The rest of the court joined in a chorus:
“Ai, Clever Johnny, son of the Sun,
Lih-ih-go! Lih-ih-go!
Ai Crazy Janey, daughter of the Devil,
Lih-ih-go! Lih-ih-go!”
After the song was done, the trumpets sounded
once more the fanfare to Clever John and Crazy Jane. It sent shivers through every
proto-Latvian who ever heard it.
That is how they once celebrated Johns Eve
in Jersika, proto-Latvia.
The story ends here. Clever John and Crazy
Jane live to this day in Jersika. They have never yet climbed out of the bed,
and this is why the soles and heels of their boots have never worn down.
(The
end.) -30-
The enslavement of human being to labor continues in China as it once did in Europe and America Tibet
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